See this big ass bag on my table? It belongs to the inconsiderate lady whose arm is in the picture. We already sat down n she has no decency to remove her bag. I’m not try to associate nationality in this case but please guess where this inconsiderate person is from. It’s not hard.

Sooooo…I have not been shortlisted for an interview with Embraer. Not surprising though, kind of saw it coming since they have been putting off notifying me for so long. Honestly, I do not feel the least bit disappointed. After the yesterday’s service, I know this is not God’s plan for me. I’ve made the wrong choice in my selection of IA companies, and He is trying to redirect me back on track.

Maybe to those who got a spot in Embraer would probably think I am just finding an excuse to comfort myself. Well, maybe I am. But who knows, seeing how they dragged and delayed the acceptance or shortlisting the interviewees, Embraer is probably not very efficient as a company. Haha, another seemingly comforting statement for myself. But I am serious, I want to believe in His plan for me, and I do believe in Him. I’d admit I have a low self confidence, but I have trust that He will lead me where he wants me to go. So if Embraer is not the way to go, then something else then! Maybe ST Aero (who rejected me in the scholarship selection) or Pratt? That way I might be colleagues with either Qian Ling or Grace

But I am not disappointed, not a least bit. If they are unable to look pass my grades then…I guess I probably would have a tough time inside as well.

Just trying out this feature of the WordPress application. As you can see I am bored from studying though frankly, I have not done much. Good news for Heat Transfer though!

Somebody should just shoot me if I ever catch another romantic comedy ever again. As much as I love them, they always leave me upset rather than hopeful for the future.

Extremely ironic.

And the thunderstorm tonight was just depressing and frightening, with thunder and lightning, on Halloween! AND AXN was showing The Exorcism of Emily Rose which I conveniently watched with Sex and the City on HBO to curb the nerves. Which also explains the first line of this entry.

I should sleep and wake up refreshed (hopefully) to get some actual work done! I have 6 tutorials to catch up on in one week in preparation for the final quiz before exams start proper. Oh, how I hate this semester.

You know what the toughest part is about growing up? That everything becomes more than just black and white. When you’re unhappy about someone, you can’t just go “I don’t friend you anymore” but instead, you have to sit and dwell upon what you would say to that person. You can’t just go up to that person that you call a friend and just list down everything that you don’t like about him. Or if that person really bugs you so much, you definitely just cannot go and give him a tight slap. Because grown-ups don’t do such things. Grown-ups are supposed to be able to think, to consider the pros and cons and become fake pretentious people who smile even though they probably hate your guts.

And I really do hate that part about growing up. I find myself turning into that kind of person, that even though I have so much, so much to vent, I cannot do so. I have to suck it up and blame it on my ill fate. I hate it when people appear preppy when in actual fact they are probably bad mouthing you behind your back. I even hate myself for being so goddamn whiny about everything that has been happening. But that IS growing up isn’t it?

I just wish I could find someone who could relate to me, you know? Doesn’t have to be the opposite sex because finding one of the same sex is already an extremely difficult task. I need someone who is able to listen and agree with my rants and frustrations and is able to bitch with me about everyone who has irritated me. And not offer me advice that I can probably dish out to another person in the same predicament. In a nutshell, I want someone like me. Don’t they say, that there is another you out there, somewhere? I want to find that person because only then I can genuinely pour out everything that I have been holding back without having to worry about any backlashes or negativities. Yeah, that’s basically it.

On a lighter and happier note, I did more retail therapy today with 3 new book purchases from Borders! Haha, though I have still 5 more new books still unread, and I think 4 or 5 more books that I got from the NLB sale previously. I’m trying to start my mini library (yeah right). I’ve been doing so much online shopping that I think it can last me till my Korea trip where I’ll just splurge more! HAHA!

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Gwen: Sigh, wish you were here.